I’ve been thinking about what it means to live with intention. I have found it valuable for my clients to look at their world and assess where they are just “floating by.” It could be at work, with their significant other, friends, children, or many other aspects of their day-to-day life. We live in a world where there are countless ways for us to connect with those around us, yet we often choose disconnection. In order to identify what it means to intentionally connect, we must first look at the ways we are choosing to disconnect.
Maybe you choose to sit apart from your spouse when a seat was available next to him or her, or you neglected to reply to the friend who asked you how you’ve been doing. Are you watching people’s lives through the screen of your phone, while choosing to stay in and avoid?
Avoidance is interesting. Sometimes we need some space and a distraction to take care of our mental health, but is there a line? Is there a point where distraction becomes avoidance? In my opinion, the answer is yes. Distraction is temporary, short-term and with distractions we have the intention of getting back to what needed addressed. Avoidance is different because there typically isn’t a defined end to the avoidant activity and our intentions are often unclear. When we become familiar with being intentional, it is easier to understand the difference.
When reviewing you daily connections, ask yourself where you may need to focus some energy. It can be helpful to start with goals. Beginning with low-risk goals that have the potential to offer high reward are the best to start with. For instance, having a goal to text one friend a week is low-risk because it does not ask much from you and the consequences aren’t large, but the potential for reward is high since you may ignite an old friendship. I would encourage you to start with some small goals. When you identify areas of disconnect, attempt to combat the disconnection with a small goal that allows for connection.
If you would like to meet with me to discuss more of what it may mean for you to live with intention, I’d be happy to work with you. Visit samnabilcounseling.com to book an appointment