The 2020 presidential election has been full of controversy. In the world of politics that seems to be the standard. The United States of America, a bi-partisan democratic republic, is inherently divisive, bringing two ends of the same spectrum together, with the hope that eventually both sides can come to some form of an agreement, or at the very least, a compromise on some of the most systemic issues pertaining to mankind.
Our 2020 presidential candidates, Donald Trump & Joe Biden, are two vastly different people with different personalities, viewpoints, and values. Ironically, they were applying for the same position in our government—the Head of State. Yet, when it comes down to it, no matter who was elected, the country continued to grow in many different ways, and many people's lives go on. The rich get richer, the middle class fluctuates and the poor will always be.
How do we find a balance in a country that is constantly in conflict with itself? I argue that it comes down to acceptance. Each election, there is a winner and a loser. The "losing" party has to accept that their candidate lost and continue living their life. But how can that happen if the president's values are opposite their own?
The answer to that comes down to understanding. Somehow, when we understand something, it makes that thing slightly easier to accept. When we take the time to understand an opposing perspective, we can then think critically and learn to accept where that person is coming from, even if we don't personally agree with them.
There is a myth that in a good relationship, there is no conflict. In fact, if a relationship has no conflict, there is usually a big underlying issue not being discussed. Conflict is necessary to maintain a good relationship, it is what helps us continue to grow and not stay stagnant or lifeless.
When conflict does arise, are you simply looking to be the winner or are you looking for understanding? If you are looking to be the winner, usually the "loser" feels rejected. If you seek to achieve understanding, the other party is free to feel accepted, even if they know you don't fully agree with them.
Empathy is as important in relationships as it is in conflict. Without empathy, a conflict becomes hostile and both parties enter defense mode. When we have empathy in our conflict, it frees both parties up to a willingness to compromise.
Think about what could be the benefits of more understanding or more empathy in your relationships. Are you willing to compromise for your significant other? Are they willing to compromise for you? If the answer to either of those questions is no, you may need to reevaluate the quality of the relationship. Maybe one or both of you is in the relationship for the wrong reasons.
Speaking to a professional can help you examine if the problems in your relationship stem from poor communication or if it is potentially toxic.
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About Sam Nabil
Sam offers therapy in Boston and Boston Marriage Counseling for adults suffering from relationship challenges, life transitions and anxiety. Sam Nabil was featured in many prestigious publications. Check out his interview with Aljazeera English, The Washington post, The Boston Globe, Fatherly magazine, Women's health magazine, Cornell university, Yahoo News, USA Today, Marriage.com
Naya Clinics offers Marriage Counselors near me, individual therapy near me, and life coaching near me in various locations across the USA and the world. Naya Clinics also offers Online marriage counseling, online therapy, and online life coaching.
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